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<title>i know it ain't cool to say this now, but i can't help the way i feel inside by AluminumFoil</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26638705">i know it ain't cool to say this now, but i can't help the way i feel inside</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AluminumFoil/pseuds/AluminumFoil'>AluminumFoil</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Albinism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Punk, F/F, First Meetings, Lesbian Ahsoka Tano, Lesbian Character, Meet-Cute, Mentioned Leia Organa, Mentioned Padmé Amidala, Minor Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, Motorcycles, Pansexual Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:34:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,404</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26638705</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AluminumFoil/pseuds/AluminumFoil</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This girl was definitely gay, and by the end of the meetup and the subsequent protest, Ahsoka would have hopefully worked up enough courage to ask her out.</p><p>There's a criminal lack of wlw fic in star wars, and also a criminal lack of tracesoka content, so i decided to make my own.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anakin Skywalker &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker &amp; Luke Skywalker, Luke Skywalker &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Trace Martez &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Trace Martez/Ahsoka Tano</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i know it ain't cool to say this now, but i can't help the way i feel inside</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>title from the song "Trust" by 7 seconds.</p><p>Thank you so much for reading!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>FUCK fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I knew I shouldn’t’ve used so many pins today. I watched the video and the lady said to use them sparingly and strategically but I just </span>
  </em>
  <span>had </span>
  <em>
    <span>to use practically all of them.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It didn’t help that the hijab she was wearing was too big, but it was the only one she could find after accidentally spilling a smoothie on her hijab this morning right after she changed it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Besides, Luke had liked it when Anakin drove her to the meetup, and when Luke was happy, Anakin was happy, and according to her older brother, his son had been crying all morning because Leia was at the doctor's office with her mother. Anakin had given her the hijab she was currently wearing as a gift after he tie-dyed it himself, but  according to him, Luke had made it for her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s only 6 months old, Anakin”, is what she had said when he told her that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t let him hear you say that!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s asleep, Skyguy. Besides, he doesn’t know that’s an insult.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Babies are smarter than you think.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now, however, she was incredibly grateful for the fact that she found this hijab in her closet in time for them to leave, and that it went relatively well with the rest of her outfit, considering she had never worn it before. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was times like these, though, that she was wishing that there were cute one-piece hijabs that weren’t for working out so it would be easier to put them on and </span>
  <em>
    <span>keep them on</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Then, her hijab hadn’t been a problem. She had just put in her earbuds and listened to X-Ray Spex, a band she wanted to try out, until she got to the meetup.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She made it there with 5 minutes to spare, thanks to Anakin’s nauseating driving that Luke seemed to enjoy, but that made everyone else that was ever in his car when he was driving either very nauseous or worried for his safety and the safety of others on the road.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, her hijab was secure and all her pins were in, but now, holding onto it tightly with her left hand was the only thing keeping everyone in the room from seeing her cap and her neck. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>While she was crawling around on the pavement, looking for one of her pins from a pack that Padme gave her when she told her sister-in-law that she was going to start wearing a hijab, she noticed a pair of dark grey off-brand doc martens with yellow laces approaching her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked up, to greet the person that was coming standing over her, and was reminded, for the millionth time since she came to this meetup, that she was very gay. Definitely gay. Very much attracted to girls. A lesbian. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The girl looking down at her looked a little shorter than Ahsoka herself, had a floppy frohawk, a denim jacket covered in hand-painted patches and what looked like tons of band pins on the front of the jacket. She didn’t know what was on the back of the jacket, but she knew by the several hand-painted scene, punk, and anarcho-communist patches on the front of her jacket that it had to be something cool. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her eyes were monolidded and dark, and she had a wide nose, cystic acne on the bottom of her left cheek, a mole directly to the left of her mouth, and thin eyebrows. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was so pretty.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Ahsoka was about to ask her what she thought she was doing, the beautiful girl spoke up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey! Are you looking for something?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uh, yeah. My hijab pin.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh! You can just have one of mine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She removed one of the safety pins that was holding a colorful, handpainted, heart-shaped patch of this wonderful girl and another girl hugging and smiling and held it out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks. I’ll give it back when I’ve found my hijab pin.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, that’s fine! I have a ton more safety pins at home. Like, practically a literal ton. I’m Trace Martez. What’s your name?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m Ahsoka. Ahsoka Tano.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Cool jacket.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks! I sewed the sleeves on by myself. The vest was my older brother’s from when he was punk.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Nice.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They stood there, in silence, as Ahsoka pinned her hijab back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I like your patches”, she said. “You’re a really good painter.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You think so?” said Trace excitedly. “Thanks! I really like painting stuff.” She pointed to the heart-shaped patch on the right arm of her jacket. “This is me and my sister, the reference was a selfie we took a couple years ago.” She then turned around and showed the huge hand-painted patch of what looked like a silver angel on her back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So it was her sister, then. Not her girlfriend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Trace spun around to show off her jacket and Ahsoka noticed a pansexual pride flag pin right next to a hand-painted Kalup Linzy patch. This girl was definitely gay, and by the end of the meetup and the subsequent protest, Ahsoka would have hopefully worked up enough courage to ask her out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I like your necklace”, Trace blurted out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh! Thanks, I made it myself out of polymer clay. I like your angel patch.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks. It’s a silver angel. I named my bike after her.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This made Ahsoka excited. “You have a motorcycle? That sounds so cool! What kind? Where did you get it? I’ve always wanted a motorcycle.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. I don’t have a motorcycle, it’s just a bicycle. I really want a motorcycle though. I’m saving up for this red and white naked motorcycle from Honda with a 998cc engine, but it costs a lot, so I got a second job to be able to save up for it faster.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What do you do?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m an assistant at  the Jiffy Lube on Steinstown Road, and I’m a cashier for Target. What do you do? And, uh, what kinds of motorcycles do you like?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m in college, but I’m also a camp counselor and a coach for a kid’s kickboxing class. I’ve also been saving up for a motorcycle, but I have my eye on a standard motorcycle from Harley-Davidson. It’s the Forty-Eight. It has a forward-riding position and forward foot control, which is good, because then it’s easier to brake, but it’s hard sometimes to stay in that position for a lot of bikers, is what I’ve heard. The forward foot controls aren’t for everybody, but I’ve tried them, and I really like them. It also has a 1200cc V-Twin engine, which I think, personally, is really cool because it offers really good torque. The bike isn’t too heavy, either, and the lean angle is really good.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wow. You know a lot about motorcycles.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, well, my other brother’s a mechanic and he has his own shop, and he works on bikes, too, so I’ve picked up a lot from him”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How many siblings do you even have?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just two older brothers.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nice. I just have one sister. She’s also older than me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Cool.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She had to ask her out. She couldn’t be a coward and miss out on a chance to go out with this unbelievably beautiful girl. She could do it. She had to do it. She-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ahsoka?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“After the meetup and the protest, do you want to come with me to this food truck that I really like? It’s parked a couple blocks away from my house, and I want to, like, talk to you more.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Like, as a date?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah! Do you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Definitely! Yeah, totally. That sounds really fun. Where is it? I can have my brother pick us up and drive us there, if you want.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sure! It’s called Suka’s Stand, it’s right in front of 2824 Argonne Street. Which brother?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The mechanic, Anakin. My other brother’s name is Obi-wan. I’m sure he’d be willing to infodump over motorcycles with you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Your brothers sound really cool.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. They are.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Their conversation was interrupted by the lead organizer of the protest, a bald albino woman with face tattoos and a battle vest announced that the protest would be starting soon and explained their route and some chants they would be using. Ahsoka wasn’t even thinking about her hijab anymore. She wasn’t even thinking about creating some loud change in her city.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was excited for her date with the prettiest girl in the world, Trace Martez.</span>
</p>
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